Hi, it’s Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM  , where we instantly improve the lives for Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care, so that you can make informed decisions, have PEACE OF MIND, real power, real control and so that you can influence decision making fast, even if you’re not a doctor or a nurse in Intensive Care!

In the last blog I talked about

Having a loved one critically ill in Intensive Care! Your comfort zone is your enemy!

You can check out last week’s blog by clicking on the link here.

In this week’s blog I want to talk about

Critical illness in Intensive Care is it time for a new paradigm?

Before I get into today’s topic, I want to share a quote with you that I wrote on today’s topic and the quote says

When your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care the scenes are set!

The all domineering “expert” Intensive Care team is dealing with a submissive family of a critically ill Patient!

This “therapeutic” relationship isn’t healthy or “therapeutic” from the start and it doesn’t help that 99% of the families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care make no informed decisions, have no peace of mind, no control, no power and no influence!

The current paradigm and framework in Intensive Care has been wrongly set by society who still believes that Patients and their families need to “suck up” to the “perceived power” and the “perceived authority” of Intensive Care teams!

Current paradigms in Intensive Care are also set around the politics, the hierarchies, the financial budgets, the bed management policies, the psychology and the intrigue in Intensive Care!

None of it is evident for families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care when they first come in contact with critical illness in Intensive Care!

In order to get a handle on things quickly, in order to make informed decisions, get peace of mind, control, power and influence, families in Intensive Care need to very quickly assert themselves, do their own research, start asking the right questions and move goals and outcomes in a direction that gets them to achieve their goals!

This suggests a strong paradigm shift from mainstream Intensive Care, where Intensive Care teams are still living and operating in a vacuum where nobody is really watching over their shoulders to make sure they are doing all the right things!

So let’s get into today’s topic.

When you are first confronted with the critical illness of your loved one in Intensive Care you most likely are completely out of your comfort zone and you simply don’t know what to do, because you don’t know what you don’t know!

And that’s OK, you didn’t ask for this situation!

Nevertheless, you need proven strategies and tools to deal with this situation quickly, because it’s an extraordinary situation and also a situation that you can’t escape.

As I said in the quote in the beginning, the paradigm, the “rules” and the frameworks in Intensive Care tend to be set from the get go when you are first confronted with your loved one’s critical illness!

And I’m not talking about your loved one being in Intensive Care for a day or two, I’m talking about situations where your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care and is either

•  very unstable and in a very critical condition

• in a life threatening situation

• not “waking up” after an induced coma

• in Intensive Care for long-term treatments and long-term stays (including long-term ventilation)

• having a severe(traumatic) head or brain injury

• threatened with an “NFR”(Not for resuscitation) or “DNR”(Do not resuscitate) order

• In a situation where the Intensive Care team suggests a “withdrawal of treatment” or a “limitation of treatment” as being “in the best interest” for your critically ill loved one

• approaching their end of life in Intensive Care 

Those are situations where the Intensive Care team is even more concerned about “managing” the paradigm when it comes to the critical illness of your loved one!

The Intensive Care team is concerned about staying in control at all times, they are concerned about outcomes, treatment, care, about diagnosis, prognosis and most importantly about the management and meaning in all of these difficult, challenging and often heartbreaking situations!

The stakes are extremely high for Intensive Care teams!

Intensive Care is a multi-Billion Dollar $$$ per year Industry with Intensive Care teams being in competition for funding, recognition, promotions, limited resources and the list goes on and on… I’m only scratching the surface here…

This is what goes on in the mind of Intensive Care teams!

How do I know?

After more than 15 years Intensive Care nursing in three different countries, where I literally worked with thousands of critically ill Patients and their families, as well as when working with Clients one on one in my counselling and consulting over the phone/Skype or via email, I have seen my fare share of the struggles that families in Intensive Care are going through.

I have also worked as a Nurse Unit Manager in Intensive Care for more than 5 years where I have seen more than enough to know, understand and have intimate insider knowledge about what’s going on “behind the scenes” in Intensive Care!

Recommended:

• THE 10 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ARE HAPPENING BEHIND THE SCENES IN INTENSIVE CARE THAT HOLD YOU BACK FROM HAVING PEACE OF MIND, CONTROL, POWER AND INFLUENCE, WHILST YOUR LOVED ONE IS CRITICALLY ILL IN INTENSIVE CARE!

Back to you!

What about your and your families’ stakes in this situation?

Let me tell you this! Your, your family’s and your critically ill loved one’s stakes are much higher that’s for sure!

And that’s not how the Intensive Care team looks at it!

Related article/video:

• How to play a “HIGH STAKES GAME” that only the Intensive Care team knows HOW TO WIN!

The reality and the fact of the matter is that Intensive Care teams are the master of setting the paradigm and the bad news is that families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care let them do it!

You need to go against the grain!

Instead it’s really time that you and your family start setting your paradigm the minute you enter Intensive Care and the minute you realize that you can’t allow yourself to be a victim of circumstances!

This is really important! Don’t do what the 99% of the families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care are doing, because you’ll end up with making no informed decisions, no peace of mind, no control, no power and no influence!

The minute you enter the Intensive Care Unit you need to have your own strong paradigm about this unique situation and you need to be determined from the start to get what you want in this “once in a lifetime” situation that you know you can’t afford to get wrong!

And this is exactly where most families in Intensive Care get it wrong from the start. They are submissive, they are waiting to be led by the Intensive Care team without realizing that the Intensive Care team knows exactly what to say, how to say it, when to say it and they also know what not to say… The Intensive Care team knows how to stay in control if you let them…

In essence, the 99% of the families in Intensive Care who make no informed decisions, have no peace of mind, no control, no power and no influence wrongly buy into the paradigm of the Intensive Care team being the “perceived power” and the “perceived authority”!

You can’t afford to be passive! Be proactive instead!

The fact of the matter is that if you want to stay in control of your and your critically ill loved one’s destiny, you need to be proactive, you can’t be idle and you can’t afford to not take charge and control!

I have seen way too many situations in my clinical practice as well as in my 1:1 counselling and consulting practice, where families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care don’t do their own research, they don’t start asking the right questions and therefore don’t set the paradigm that they know they need in order to make informed decisions, get peace of mind, control, power and influence and ultimately get what they want!

It really starts with you having the right frame of mind from the start! It starts the minute you enter the Intensive Care Unit for the very first time!

It needs to show in your body language, in your communication style, in your tone of voice, in the questions that you’re asking and more importantly in how much you believe in yourself that you can master this challenge!

Related article/ video:

• WHAT YOUR BODY LANGUAGE AND YOUR TONE OF VOICE COMMUNICATES TO THE INTENSIVE CARE TEAM AND WHY YOU NEED TO CHANGE IT URGENTLY SO YOU CAN HAVE PEACE OF MIND, CONTROL, POWER AND INFLUENCE!

We all know that a paradigm shift is necessary when your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care and we also know that you are in control of it when you are doing the right things from the get go!

It’ll be up to you to implement it from the start and don’t let anybody else tell you otherwise!

Your friend

Patrik