Hi, it’s Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM , where we INSTANTLY improve the lives of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care, so that you can have PEACE OF MIND, real power, real control and so that you can influence decision making FAST, even if you’re not a doctor or a nurse in Intensive Care!
In last week’s PODCAST I interviewed LORETTE GIJSBERS FROM “FAMILY CENTRED INTENSIVE CARE”
You can check out last week’s PODCAST by clicking on the link here.
In this week’s BLOG I want to share with you
Having a loved one critically ill in Intensive
Care is nothing short of being a “ONCE IN A LIFETIME” challenge and “ONCE IN A LIFETIME” experience.
PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence are not words, feelings or realities you can easily associate with when your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care!
If anything, fear, frustration,
anxiety, stress, overwhelm, sleepless nights, being way outside of your comfort zone and vulnerability are the words, feelings, challenges and realities you are dealing with!
And if you are like the 99% of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care who have
no PEACE OF MIND, no control, no power and no influence, you are extremely passive, you watch and you witness an event that leaves you paralysed!
You need to be pro-active and you must make up your own mind!
But if you want to have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence you need to pro-actively seeking a way out of the dilemma!
Most Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care have no PEACE OF MIND, no control, no power and no influence!
Most Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive
Care don’t make up their own mind!
Related article:
Why you must make up your own mind if your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care, even if you’re not a doctor or a nurse!
And most Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care have no idea what to do if their loved one is either
- very unstable and in a very critical condition
- in a life threatening situation
- in Intensive Care for long-term
treatments and long-term stays
- having a severe(traumatic) head or brain injury
- threatened with an “NFR”(Not for resuscitation) or “DNR”(Do not resuscitate) order
- In a situation where the Intensive Care team suggests a “withdrawal of treatment” or a “limitation of treatment” as being “in the best interest” of your critically ill loved one
- approaching their end of life in Intensive Care
These are also the situations where you and your family are at a total loss what to do and if you want to get a handle on
things quickly you will actually need to step outside of your comfort zone and also deal with and manage the Intensive Care team!
Keep in mind that you are way outside of your comfort zone already, but you just need to use being “outside of your
comfort zone” to your advantage by challenging the Intensive Care team!
After more than 15 years Intensive Care nursing in three different countries where I have literally worked with thousands of critically ill Patients and their Families, I have seen over and over again that you actually do need to step outside of your comfort zone in order to have PEACE OF MIND, have power, have control and have influence and you may in the process also ruffle some feathers with the Intensive Care team!
And rightly so!
Keep in mind, I am not talking to you if your loved one is a “straight forward” ICU admission and will be out of ICU in a couple of days or so! I am
talking to you because your critically ill loved one is either
- very unstable and in a very critical condition
- in a life threatening situation
- in Intensive Care for long-term treatments and long-term stays
- having a severe(traumatic) head or brain injury
- threatened with an “NFR”(Not for resuscitation) or “DNR”(Do not resuscitate) order
- In a situation where the Intensive Care team suggests a “withdrawal of
treatment” or a “limitation of treatment” as being “in the best interest” of your critically ill loved one
- approaching their end of life in Intensive
Care
I also need to get a couple of things straight here!
You will need some wonderful people in Intensive Care, Doctors and nurses.
However, if your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care and is in one of the aforementioned challenging and difficult situations, you can’t afford to not
have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!
And during the aforementioned challenging, difficult and often heartbreaking situations you will be hearing things from the Intensive Care team that leave you even more challenged!
Keep in mind, the Intensive Care team knows what to say and how to say it!
Standing out from the crowd is what get’s you to the truth of the matter you are dealing with!
You may or may not be able to direct the care and treatment of your critically ill loved one, however you need to make sure that you give it
your best shot, because the things that are happening in Intensive Care “BEHIND THE SCENES” are so powerful that they almost always impact on how the Intensive Care team positions your critically ill loved one’s diagnosis and prognosis!
And if you stand out from the crowd, if you start doing your own research, if you start asking questions, if you even start asking “difficult” questions, the Intensive Care team may well perceive you as “difficult and demanding”!
Related article:
The 5 reasons why you need to be DIFFICULT and DEMANDING when your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care
The
number of times I have seen and heard Intensive Care teams refer to Families of critically ill Patients as being “difficult” or “demanding” in their handovers is rather concerning!
It usually happens when Families in Intensive Care start doing their own research, when Families
dare to look “BEHIND THE SCENES” in Intensive Care, when they are extremely and genuinely concerned about their loved one’s best interest and when they dare to challenge the Intensive Care team’s assumptions!
It also
goes to show that there is a lot at stake in Intensive Care that goes way beyond your critically ill loved one’s diagnosis and prognosis.
Related articles:
Why decision making in Intensive Care GOES WAY BEYOND your critically ill loved one’s DIAGNOSIS AND PROGNOSIS!
How to play a “high stakes game” that only the Intensive Care team knows how to win
It also goes to show that the culture in an Intensive Care unit is something you and your family need to observe carefully and you need to get a feeling and an
idea whether you are dealing with a positive or a negative culture in an Intensive Care Unit!
You absolutely must observe or get a feel for the culture of the Intensive Care team!
A positive culture in an Intensive Care Unit makes a huge difference to Patients, their families and the staff! Even in those challenging and difficult situations that I mentioned before!
You most likely will be treated with courtesy and you most likely will be treated with respect and your opinions are taken into consideration!
Many Intensive Care Units however have a negative culture and politics, dynamics,
power play and power struggles, hierarchy, competition for limited resources, the intrigue and the psychology have a huge impact how the Intensive Care team is dealing with you, your family and your critically ill loved one!
Related
article:
What the doctors and the nurses behaviour in Intensive Care is telling you about the culture in a unit
However, you also need to know that if you think that the Intensive Care team refers to you as being “difficult and demanding” in their handovers, you should be taking it as a complement!
99% of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care who have no PEACE OF MIND, no power, no control and no influence have long given up, they put the Intensive Care team on a pedestal, they “suck up” to the Intensive Care team, they don’t “rock the boat” and they
are oblivious to the fact that
- the financial interests and the financial budget of the Intensive Care Unit
- the bed management pressures in Intensive Care, with numerous other critically ill Patients awaiting an precious, scarce, expensive and “in-demand” Intensive Care bed
- the medical
research interests of an Intensive Care Unit- Medical research attracts Multi- Million Dollar $$$ per year funding into Intensive Care Units and is often a positioning tool for ICU’s
are almost always playing a huge role in how
the Intensive Care team positions your critically ill loved one’s diagnosis and prognosis!
Therefore if the Intensive Care team paints a “doom and gloom” and negative picture, you and your family need to be on “high
alert”!
Is the Intensive Care team open and transparent with you or do they have anything to hide?
If the Intensive Care team is not being open and transparent and if the Intensive Care team keeps you at “arm’s length” you need to move “heaven and earth”, so to speak to get to the truth of the matter quickly!
Your job is to have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence, no matter what!
Even if your critically ill loved one is inevitably dying or approaching their end of life, you need to make
sure that the Intensive Care team is telling you the truth, so that you and your family are not taken for a ride!
For example the Intensive Care team might want to “sell” you on a “withdrawal” or “limitation of
treatment” as being “IN THE BEST INTEREST” of your critically ill loved one, because they desperately need the ICU bed for the next Patient or they think they are not meeting their budget targets when continuing treatment for your critically ill loved one!
Or even worse, if your loved one is really critically ill and the Intensive Care team can’t enrol your critically ill loved one in a medical research study and they therefore want to (re-)allocate their resources towards other “more interesting” Patients who “qualify” for medical research that attracts more funding!
The bottom line is that if you have even the slightest doubt that the Intensive Care team is difficult to deal with, you mustn’t retreat and if anything you need to keep pushing until you have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence to the point where you know that your critically ill loved
one is getting fair, equitable and just treatment that is not dependent on what’s happening “BEHIND THE SCENES” in Intensive Care!
Please let me know if you have any questions. Send your questions to support@intensivecarehotline.com
If you want your
questions answered just hit reply to this email or email me at support@intensivecarehotline.com and I'll answer your questions!
You can also send through your stories and share them on our BLOG for our
readers! Just email support@intensivecarehotline.com or leave a comment on our BLOG
Or if you want to be featured on our PODCAST with your story, just email me at support@intensivecarehotline.com
PS
our cutting edge new information PRODUCT has been released, (CLICK ON THE LINK)
“THE FAST LANE FOR PEACE OF MIND, CONTROL, POWER AND INFLUENCE WHEN YOUR LOVED ONE IS CRITICALLY ILL
IN INTENSIVE CARE!”
You can check it out other products here
http://intensivecarehotline.com/products/
We also offer ONE on ONE consulting via Skype or over the phone, where you
can get direct access to me!
All our information PRODUCTS are helping Families of critically ill Patients MASTER, take control, have power and influence in all of the
most challenging situations in Intensive Care, even if their loved one is dying!
Our information products are an "IN-DEPTH" education product for Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care and a SHORTCUT for Families to have PEACE OF MIND, control, power& influence! The focus of the education product will be on PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence during the following situations in Intensive Care
- long-term stays in Intensive Care
- Family meetings with the Intensive Care team
- withdrawal of treatment situations and/or perceived medical futility
- what to do if your critically ill loved
one is THREATENED with an "NFR" (Not for resuscitation) or "DNR" (Do not resuscitate) order
- severe head and brain injuries (including traumatic brain injuries and stroke)
Our information products are available in Ebook, Video or audio recordings so that you can access the information in your chosen medium.
Whether you prefer to read, watch or listen, it's all there for you!
Our Ebooks, Videos and Audio recordings are solutions to the biggest and most challenging areas in Intensive Care for Families of critically ill Patients!
Our information PRODUCTS are a shortcut to PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence for
Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care!
If you have any questions about our information products or if you have any suggestions
please let me know at support@intensivecarehotline.com or you can contact me on Skype. My Skype ID is patrik.hutzel
Phone us now on Skype at patrik.hutzel or
phone 415-915-0090 in the USA/ Canada 
phone 03 8658 2138 in Australia/ New Zealand 
phone 0118 324 3018 in the UK/ Ireland 
Your Friend
Patrik Hutzel
Critical Care Nurse
Founder& Editor
WWW.INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM