Hi, it's Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM , where we instantly
improve the lives of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care, so that you can have PEACE OF MIND, real power, real control and so that you can influence decision making fast, even if you're not a doctor or a nurse in Intensive Care!
In last week's BLOG I've featured another PODCAST with Laura's inspirational story who's Dad has
been in Intensive Care since March 2014! You can check out last week's interview "Podcast with Laura who's father has been in Intensive Care since the 21st March 2014 with a subdural haematoma. He's not waking up! Listen to Laura's
story!" by clicking on the link here!
In this week's BLOG I want to show you
THE PERFECT EXCUSE why Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care have no PEACE OF MIND, control, power& influence!
Having a loved one critically ill in Intensive Care triggers all sorts of feelings, emotions, thoughts, behaviours and also irrational responses from Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care!
Worst of all, Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care tend to be paralysed by
fear, frustration, stress and they allow their vulnerability in those circumstances to get overwhelmed and to get bogged down by negative emotions. This is especially important for you to know if your critically ill loved one is in one of the following often "ONCE IN A LIFETIME" situations where
- They are very unstable and in a very critical condition
- They are in a life threatening situation
- They are
in Intensive Care for long-term treatments and long-term stays
- They have a severe(traumatic) head or brain injury
- They are approaching their end of life in Intensive Care
Those scenarios also get Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care to become cynical, they often lay blame on other people, which more often than not also leads them to be making excuses why Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care can't have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!
The perfect scenario for making excuses is often driven by powerful emotions!
It's the perfect scenario for why 99% of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care don't have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence! And the sad reality is that it's
driven by their own insecurity, by their internal and secrets fears, their frustrations and it can also often be driven by guilt and shame.
Those are extremely powerful emotions you and your Family are dealing with and if you and your Family don't get a different perspective quickly and if you and your Family don't learn the
right tools, arm yourself with the right weapons and get a "BEHIND THE SCENES" view about what's really happening in Intensive Care, you will be like 99% of Families of critically ill Patients who have no PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence and you will continue making excuses!
Laying blame, being
paralysed by fear, handing over and surrendering your level of control, power and influence to the Intensive Care team is the biggest mistake you can ever make and it often is a "good excuse" for Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care! It also aligns well with the strategy of the Intensive Care team who wants you to be passive and not active in this situation!
By you making excuses often aligns well with the Intensive Care team's agenda!
After all the Intensive Care team has a clear cut agenda to drive that is a direct result of what's happening "BEHIND THE SCENES" in Intensive Care. "BEHIND THE SCENES" is
where the Intensive Care team is making decisions, "BEHIND THE SCENES" is where the Intensive Care team positions your critically ill loved one's diagnosis and prognosis and "BEHIND THE SCENES" is where the Intensive Care team is making decisions about the care and the treatment offered to you and your critically ill loved one!
"BEHIND THE SCENES" also means that every decision the Intensive Care team makes, is driven by the power play, the dynamics, the intrigue, the psychology and most of all by the hidden agendas in Intensive Care!
"BEHIND THE SCENES" also means that the Intensive Care team looks at
those things that are sacred to the Intensive Care team and that they would never share with you such as
- The financial viability of your critically ill loved one's stay in Intensive Care from the Intensive Care team's perspective, i.e. will they make money or will they lose
money
- The bed status and the bed situation in the Intensive Care Unit, i.e. will continuing treatment on your critically ill loved one block a bed for other Patients who are in need of a precious and expensive Intensive Care bed and does the Intensive Care team think that other Patients would be more interesting to treat or would they be financially more viable?
- The medical research interests of the Intensive Care team. Medical research is a Multi Million Dollar $$$ per year industry and many Intensive Care Units rely on those revenue streams in order to not only perform medical research on real human beings without often informing them and without giving them or their Families a choice
It's not your fault!
And I know it's not your fault. You would have never guessed that what's happening "BEHIND THE SCENES" in Intensive Care could be so important for you and your Family to know, because the reality and
the fact of the matter is that I didn't know either when I first started to work in Intensive Care!
However after more than 15 years Intensive Care nursing in three different countries I have gained insights, I have learned lessons and more importantly I have literally looked after thousands of critically ill Patients and
their Families and I have hold their hands, I have consoled them and I have guided them through one of the most stressful and sometimes traumatic experiences in their life.
If I have found strategies, you will find strategies too!
I have also looked after many critically ill Patients and their Families who died in Intensive Care and by seeing their heart breaking, it broke my heart too and I knew I had to find a way out of this dilemma, as I knew that if I can't get it handled when dealing with critical illness, death and end of life that I couldn't continue working in Intensive Care!
And I did find a way out of the dilemma, by offering real world solutions how to deal with the emotional drama and more importantly how to get PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!
The reality
and the fact of the matter is that if I have found strategies, coping mechanisms and ways out of dealing with such situations where your critically ill loved one is in a situation where
- They are very unstable and in a very critical condition
- They are in a life threatening situation
- They are in Intensive Care for long-term treatments and long-term stays
- They have a severe(traumatic) head or brain injury
- They are approaching their end of life in Intensive Care
You can find ways out of those dilemmas as well and you can now relax and you can stop doing what 99% of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care are doing who are making excuses, who lay blame, who become cynical and who don't take
responsibility for their actions, their thoughts, their feelings and their emotions!
Take responsibility instead and get an unfair advantage!
By you stopping to
make excuses, by you taking responsibility for every thought you think, every action you take, every word you say to the Intensive care team, every word you don't say to the Intensive Care team will automatically assume PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!
By you and your Family stopping to make
excuses why you can't have PEACE OF MIND, why you can't have control, why you can't have power and why you can't have influence and by you and your Family learning what's happening "BEHIND THE SCENES" and therefore counteracting the Intensive Care team's perceived authority and perceived power you will automatically assume PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!
When you and your Family stop making excuses why you can't have PEACE OF MIND, why you can't have control, why you can't have power and why you can't have influence you are getting an unfair advantage and you have armed yourself with weapons that will clearly make you superior to 99% of the Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care who continue to make excuses, who continue to
lay blame on other people and who continue to chose not to assume PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!
You and your Family however have made a conscious choice! You know that PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence are within your reach, if you only learned the right things and if you only learned what's
happening "BEHIND THE SCENES" in Intensive Care so that you can position yourself powerfully and so that you can ask the right questions so that the Intensive Care team knows that you are asking "insider" questions that will automatically pushback on the Intensive Care team's perceived authority, which is an authority that Intensive Care team's have relied upon since Intensive Care came on as a speciality in the medical field in the 1960's and 1970's. It's also an
authority that has more or less been unquestioned so far, because Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care, once again have been too busy making excuses rather than taking action!
Also, check out our "YOUR QUESTIONS
ANSWERED" section
where I answer all of YOUR questions
http://intensivecarehotline.com/category/questions/
In this week I answer another question from one of our readers and the question this week is
My Dad had a STROKE, has been in Intensive Care for more than 2 ½ months now and is STILL VENTILATED with a Tracheostomy, will he EVER GET OFF the ventilator?
This is another episode of "YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED" and in last week's episode I answered another question from one of our
readers and the question last week was "I have MS, I was in ICU with Pneumonia and the Intensive Care team completely ignored my wishes to not have any life support!"
You can check out the answer to last week's question here.
In this week's episode of "YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED" I want to answer another question from one of our readers and in this week Peter from Melbourne, Australia asks
"My Dad had a STROKE, has been in Intensive Care for more than 2 ½ months now and is STILL VENTILATED with a Tracheostomy, will he EVER GET OFF the ventilator?"
Hi Patrik,
I am Peter from Melbourne, Australia, my 78 yrs old dad has had a CVA/stroke and is in a minimally conscious state for the last 2.5 months.
Ever since he has been on a ventilator with Tracheostomy, although in the past two weeks the doctors have tried to wean him off twice once for 36 hrs and another for 45 hrs , however after that he
became breathless and he became extremely tired.
Can you please advise me how you feel about his situation and about his case, do you think my dad will be able to breathe properly without the support of a ventilator or not?
Hi Peter,
Thank you for your email and thank you for making contact!
First of all, I am very sorry to hear what you and your Family are going through with your Dad's long-term stay in Intensive Care!
It is extremely challenging and frustrating when
you are confronted with a loved one being a long-term Patient in Intensive Care! It's even worse once you realise that your critically ill loved one is unable to be weaned off the ventilator!
In your Dad's situation from what you describe and from what I can see, having been in Intensive Care for 2.5 months after a
stroke and the Intensive Care team "only" tried to take your father off the ventilator on two occasions, one over 36 hours and one over 45 hours doesn't appear to be a long enough time frame in order to succeed!
Having said that, normally, weaning a critically ill Patient off the ventilator can take sometimes weeks or even
months and normally what happens is to start a weaning regime and those weaning regimes often start slow with having two hours off the ventilator a day and then slowly increasing the time that your Dad can stay off the ventilator!
The goal would then be within a few days or a few weeks to have your Dad breathing without the
ventilator during the day and then having a rest period overnight where your Dad can be supported by the ventilator overnight!
Of course, this can be difficult to be achieved especially if your Dad had a severe CVA/ stroke that keeps him unconscious!
However as a rule of thumb, you and your Family may have to be patient and once again, just from what you describe, within a 2.5 month time frame trying to wean only twice over a 36 and a 45 hour period is not long enough and sounds very vague to me.
Furthermore you also need to ensure that your Dad is getting good nursing care such as
- Getting mobilised out of bed in a chair regularly
- Getting regular washes
and showers daily
- Good mouthcare
- Getting out into the sun and getting some fresh air
- Having good and experienced nursing staff looking after your Dad
- Making sure that the Intensive Care team is not "neglecting" your father because they think he is a "hopeless case". Often Intensive Care teams get frustrated with long term ventilated Patients with Tracheostomy and they often don't give them the attention they need
These points
are essential in order to achieve your goals!
The other thing that I can see as well is that if your Dad is in a minimally conscious state you need to ask where you are going from here and what you, your Family and your Dad want in a situation like this?
For example, are you prepared to
- Carry on weaning him off the ventilator in Intensive Care with an uncertain outcome, probably putting your and your Family's life on hold in the
process?
- Take your father home with the professional support of Intensive Care home services that specialises on long-term ventilation with Tracheostomy, this can and will improve your Dad's Quality of life and/or Quality of end of life and you can stop visiting Intensive Care and putting your life on hold!
- Given that you're in Melbourne, Australia check out INTENSIVECAREATHOME.COM.AU for tailor made home Intensive Care services as a genuine alternative to a long-term stay in Intensive Care
Once again, weaning your Dad for 36 and 45 hours respectively in a 2.5 month period doesn't sound to me like a serious attempt to get your Dad off the ventilator and the Tracheostomy, therefore you may also have to consider the following
- Does the Intensive Care team have an interest keeping your loved in Intensive Care to keep their beds occupied and earn money and/or attract funding?
- Would the Intensive Care team conduct any research on your Dad and do they therefore not have an interest in getting your Dad off the
ventilator?
- What would your Dad want in this situation if he could make a decision himself?
- Would it be better for your Dad to stop life support?
I think from what you describe, your best chances are to take your Dad home with the help of specialised services, (INTENSIVECAREATHOME.COM.AU ) that would probably also be more cost effective compared to a long-term stay in Intensive Care and provide your Dad and
your Family with a better Quality of life and/or Quality of end of life and in the process probably also have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!
Also, just by being at home you , your Family and your Dad, would also feel so much more at ease and your Dad, even though currently in a minimally conscious state, might
feel the difference by being at home and he may get a boost!
Here are some related articles that will help you understand more about Tracheostomy and ventilator dependency and also how you need to manage the Intensive Care team
· My sister has been in ICU for 21 weeks with Tracheostomy and still ventilated. What do we need to do?
http://intensivecarehotline.com/my-sister-has-been-in-icu-for-21-weeks-with-tracheostomy-and-still-ventilated-what-do-we-need-to-do/
- How long is too long to stay on a ventilator or respirator?
http://intensivecarehotline.com/long-long-stay-ventilator-respirator/
Here are some related articles that will help you dealing with the Intensive Care team
- Is it "SEXY" for the Intensive Care team to treat your loved one who requires a long-term stay in Intensive Care?
http://intensivecarehotline.com/sexy-intensive-care-team-treat-loved-one-requires-long-term-stay-intensive-care/
- How to stay positive if your loved one is critically ill in Intensive
Care
http://intensivecarehotline.com/stay-positive-loved-one-critically-ill
http://intensivecarehotline.com/stop-intimidated-intensive-care-team-will-seen-equals/
I hope that I was able to serve you with this answer and
please let me know if you have any more questions!
Sincerely, your Friend
Patrik Hutzel
If you want your questions answered just hit reply to this email or email me at support@intensivecarehotline.com and I'll answer your
questions!
Also keep an eye out for our upcoming product launch in the next couple of months! We are NOW finalizing our first product that will help Families of critically ill Patients MASTER, take control, have power and influence in all of the most challenging situations in Intensive Care, even if their loved one is dying!
The product will be an "IN-DEPTH" education product for Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care and a SHORTCUT for Families to have PEACE OF MIND, control, power& influence! The focus of the education product will be on PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence during the following situations in Intensive Care
- long-term stays in
Intensive Care
- end- of- life situations
- Family meetings with the Intensive Care team
- withdrawal of treatment situations and/or perceived medical futility
- severe head and brain injuries
The product will be made available in Ebook, Video and Audio format so that our Customers
can consume the product in their chosen medium!
If you have any questions about our upcoming products or if you have any suggestions
please let
me know at support@intensivecarehotline.com
Your Friend
Patrik Hutzel
Critical Care
Nurse
Founder& Editor
WWW.INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM
