Hi, it's Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM , where we instantly improve the lives of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care, so that you can have real power, real control and so that you can influence decision making fast, even if you're not a doctor or a nurse in Intensive Care!

In last week's blog I've shown you "How to get peace of mind, more control, more power and influence if your critically ill loved one is dying in Intensive Care!" You can read, watch or listen to the update here.

In this week's blog I want to show you The 4 ways you can overcome INSURMOUNTABLE OBSTACLES whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care

Having a loved one critically ill in Intensive Care can be a daunting, frustrating, challenging and scary experience. Families of critically ill Patients are thrown out of their comfort zone in an instant and they generally feel very vulnerable and they feel like they have no PEACE OF MIND, no control, no power and no influence.

The issues and challenges Families of critically ill Patients are dealing with appear to be insurmountable at the beginning. Especially since the Intensive Care team is holding all the perceived power and 99% of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care don't challenge that assumption and they don't question the agenda and the perceived power of the Intensive Care team. They let that perception dominate their reality...

Not a good starting point.

The role the Intensive Care team plays and your perceptions about it...

I know that having a loved one critically ill in Intensive Care appears to be an insurmountable challenge and aninsurmountable obstacle for you and your Family, but that's only because you have handed over all of your power, control and influence to the Intensive Care team the minute you've met them and the minute your critically ill loved one was admitted to Intensive Care. You have consciously or unconsciously already decided in your head that the Intensive Care team must have all the answers...

And you'll be bitterly disappointed when you find out that the Intensive Care team can't help your critically ill loved one or if they can't help your critically ill loved one as quickly as you would have anticipated.

Especially since you and your Family are most likely not familiar with the Intensive Care environment you feel like you, your Family and your critically ill loved one face insurmountable obstacles...

What if the odds are stacked against you and against your critically ill loved one?

Now, once again if you are in the situation where your loved one has just been admitted to Intensive Care for critical illness and if you and your Family think you have been told that your critically ill loved one is either

• very unstable and in a very critical condition
•  in a life threatening situation
• in Intensive Care for long-term treatments and long-term stays
• approaching their end of life in Intensive Care

Those situations are extremely challenging, frustrating and in those situations you feel like you are facing insurmountable obstacles and insurmountable challenges and you most likely feel like the odds are stacked against you, against your Family and against your critically ill loved one!

In more than 15 years Intensive Care nursing in three different countries I have seen and dealt with many of thoseinsurmountable challenges and insurmountable obstacles.

The biggest lessons that I have learned in those situations is that it's usually never as bad as you think it is and that there are ways of how to handle those crisis situations.

Therefore, let's look at "The 4 ways you can overcome insurmountable obstacles whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care!"

 1.       Make meaning out of the situation

I know, you probably don't feel like "making meaning" out of this situation. You probably think, "why me? "or "why is this happening to my family?" or you may think along the lines of "why must my loved one be going through this?".

Those feeling and thoughts are normal and they are sort of "intuitive". Those thoughts are also putting you in a passive position and you have taken and you have assumed the role of a victim. By thinking those thoughts and by having those feelings you have automatically given your level of power, your level of control and your level of influence away and you have directly or indirectly handed over your level of control, power and influence over to the Intensive Care team...

Not good and you are now in a situation where you and your Family have those negative thoughts and negative feelings dominate your feelings, behaviour and your thinking!

The trick here is to change your thinking from  being a "victim" to make meaning out of this situation.

What does this situation mean to you personally, what does it mean for your family and what does it mean for your critically ill loved one?

What's the meaning behind of this "tragedy"?

Is it that your Family is coming closer together during this time of crisis?

Is it that life is teaching you a lesson about adversity and how to effectively deal with it? Have you and your Family been in other situations where you felt like a victim and you didn't know what to do about it and you didn't know how you needed to deal with adversity? The meaning in this situation may well be that dealing with adversity is easier than you think it is, irrespective of the challenges, obstacles and the odds that you are facing...

Is this situation a situation where all of a sudden you can see why your critically ill loved one is in the situation that they are in? If that's the case you probably feel uncomfortable talking about it and you might not feel like sharing it with the outside world. That's OK, but know the meaning behind the situation that you're in and use it to your, your families and your critically ill loved one's advantage!

2.       Know that you are and that you can be resilient

Did you know that you are a miracle? Did you know that you and your critically ill loved one's genes have survived over millions of years against many odds?

If you are reading this right now it means that you and your Family are survivors of millions of generations that have come before you! If you think about it, your ancestors not all that long ago didn't have the luxuries, the modern technology, the medical facilities and modern communication channels available like we have today.

It also means that irrespective of the challenges and obstacles that you are facing now that you, your Family and your critically ill loved have done pretty well over millions of years, because your ancestors knew what to do in situations of crisis, because otherwise you and your Family wouldn't be here today. It's as simple as that. You and your Family are resilient, because your ancestors have survived millions or hundreds of thousands of years of adversity, wars, famine and the like, way before modern civilisation like we know it today have been a reality.

That also means that deep down you already know what to do and you know how to deal with adversity and don't let anybody else tell you any differently...

Think about those stories from your parents, grandparents or even great-grandparents on how they survived adversity during times of crisis and use those strategies to your advantage!

3.       Change your body language

I bet the minute you have heard that your loved one has been admitted to Intensive Care or the minute you have entered Intensive Care, you consciously or unconsciously changed your body language!

I bet you started crossing your arms, you slumped your shoulders, your back is not straight, your chest is bent inwards, you're avoiding eye contact, you are putting your head down and so on.

How does this type of body language make you feel and what does it say about you? What do you express with that type of body language to the outside world?

Now changing your body language during times of crisis is normal. The challenge is to recognize it and to change it!

Our body language is extremely powerful, positive and negative.

Do you think the Intensive Care team views you as powerful, in control and influential if you are crossing your arms, if your head is down, if you are not standing or sitting straight and if you're avoiding eye contact?

Do you think your Family and your critically ill loved one think that you are powerful, in control and influential if you are crossing your arms, if your head is down, if you are not standing or sitting straight and if you're avoiding eye contact?

On the other hand how does it make you feel if you have your body language under control? How do you feel if you

• Uncross your arms
• If you make strong eye contact
• Put out your chest
• Straighten your back
• Are holding your head high

I bet the minute you have strong and powerful body language that's the minute when things will change for you.

You are sending a very strong signal to the world, by telling everybody through your body language that you can overcome insurmountable obstacles and insurmountable challenges.

I bet that your Family, your critically ill loved one and the Intensive Care team will notice. I also bet that you feel more confident if you have your body language handled.

I also bet that the dynamics will shift in your favour immediately...

 4.       Ask the right questions

CONTINUE READING here http://intensivecarehotline.com/the-4-ways-you-can-overcome-insurmountable-obstacles-whilst-your-loved-one-is-critically-ill-in-intensive-care/

Also, check out our "YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED" section

where I answer all your questions!

http://intensivecarehotline.com/category/questions/

In this week I answer another one of OUR READER'S question

A family member of ours in his 30′s is DYING in Intensive Care and we're not SURE whether it's the only OPTION, please help!

Find the answer to this question here http://intensivecarehotline.com/a-family-member-of-ours-in-his-30s-is-dying-in-intensive-care-and-were-not-sure-whether-its-the-only-option-please-help/

If you want your questions answered just hit reply to this email or email me at support@intensivecarehotline.com and I'll answer your questions!

Also keep an eye out for our upcoming product launch in the next couple of months! We are NOW finalizing our first product that will help Families of critically ill Patients deal with and take control of most situations in Intensive Care, even if their loved one is dying!

 The product will be an "IN-DEPTH" education product for Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care and a SHORTCUT for Families to control, power& influence! The focus of the education product will be on PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence during the following situations in Intensive Care

• long-term stays in Intensive Care 
• end- of- life situations
• Family meetings
• withdrawal of treatment situations and/or perceived medical futility
• how Families need to manage doctors and nurses
• how to manage fears, frustration and emotions

 The product will be made available in Ebook, Video and Audio format so that our Customers can consume the product in their chosen medium!

 If you have any questions about our upcoming products or if you have any suggestions please let me know at support@intensivecarehotline.com

Your Friend

Patrik Hutzel

Critical Care Nurse

Founder& Editor

WWW.INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM