Hi, it's Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM , where we instantly improve the
lives of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care, so that you can have PEACE OF MIND, real power, real control and so that you can influence decision making fast, even if you're not a doctor or a nurse in Intensive Care!
In last week's blog I've shown you "Why Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care need to aim higher!"You can read, watch or
listen to last week's update by clicking on the link here!
In this
week's blog I want to share with you
The four DEADLY SINS that Families of critically ill
Patients in Intensive Care CONSTANTLY MAKE, but they are UNAWARE OF!
It's very easy to get bogged down, it's very easy to be drowning in sorrow and negativity if your loved one has been admitted to Intensive Care for critical illness. After all, this often "once in a lifetime" experience is most likely one of the biggest challenges that you, your Family and your critically ill loved one will encounter in your lifetime!
You and your Family are facing your worst nightmares
The discomfort you, your Family and your critically ill loved one are facing is the discomfort that throws you out of your comfort zone immediately and you and your Family are faced with your worst nightmares that can manifest itself in the form of fear, frustration, discomfort, vulnerability, death, disability and the loss of control!
And if you are like 99% of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care you let
things happen to you, even though you realize that other people are running the show. You and your Family have realized by now that the Intensive Care team is holding all the perceived power and they are calling the shots.
And if you continue to be like 99% of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care you have no idea how to have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence during this stressful, demanding, challenging and frustrating experience whilst your loved one is critically ill in Intensive Care!
You see, in more than 15 years Intensive Care nursing experience in three different countries and after working with thousands of critically ill Patients and their Families, I have seen over and over again that Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care commit FOUR deadly sins over and over again and it leaves them without PEACE OF MIND, power, control and influence during a time where your Family and your critically ill loved one need you the most!
You are in a unique and "once in a lifetime" situation where you, your Family and your critically ill loved one can't afford to be dependent or at the mercy of other people, especially since there is so much at stake.
You and your Family are involved in a high stakes game and only the Intensive Care team knows how to play...
What's at stake is your critically ill loved one's
health and their life, your and your Family's mental and physical well-being and what's also at stake are the interests of the Intensive Care team!
With those high stakes in mind I want to show you "The FOUR DEADLY SINS that Families
of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care CONSTANTLY MAKE, but they are UNAWARE of!"
1. They are paralysed by fear
Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care are paralysed by fear
and they are therefore unable to make any sense out of this challenging situation, let alone have PEACE OF MIND, control, power or influence!
They don't even know that PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence are a possibility in this challenging situation!
Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care tend to be so focused on what the Intensive Care
team has to say that they totally forget that they should have an opinion about the situation as well. The big problem here is that they are generally so frustrated by the whole situation that they don't even contemplate to do their own research. That's a big challenge and a big mistake!
In order for you and your Family to look at
the situation differently and in order for you and your Family to stop being paralysed by fear, you need to start looking at the situation differently and you and your Family need to start doing what other Families in Intensive Care are not doing.
As I have hinted towards, 99% of Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care don't question, they don't believe that they can have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence and they also haven't even contemplated that the Intensive Care team generally speaking has other interests that often go way beyond your critically ill loved one's prognosis and diagnosis.
Therefore, your job is to become aware that you and your Family are paralysed by fear and your job is to tackle your fear, look it in the eye and say, "Yes, I can handle this challenge, yes I can start pro- actively managing the situation and the Intensive Care team and I can get the outcome that I want!"
Do that and you have separated yourself from the rest of the 99% of Families who don't have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence and I bet the Intensive Care team will notice, because they are generally used to dealing with Families that are paralysed by fear and those Families are handing over their power to the Intensive Care team on a
platter, doing themselves and their critically ill loved one a massive disservice and doing the Intensive Care team a massive favour!
Related Articles
2. Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care are intimidated by the Intensive Care team
This one is one of my favourite topics and I get frustrated if not angry when I
start talking about it!
Once again, you and your Family are playing a high stakes game and I have seen the Intensive Care team "winning" the game over and over again, because
Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care are unprepared and worst of all they are intimidated by the Intensive Care team.
Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive
Care think that the Intensive Care team must be smart. After all they are highly skilled professionals and they have attended university, so they must have all the answers...
Your job is to stop being intimidated by the Intensive Care team, because if you don't, the Intensive Care team will keep the upper hand and keep you and your
Family at arm's length so to speak.
This is especially important for you and for your Family if your critically ill loved one is in one of the following situations where they are
- very unstable and in a very critical condition
- in a life threatening situation
- in Intensive Care for long-term treatments and long-term stays
- approaching their end of life in Intensive Care
If your critically ill loved one is
in one of those situations and if you are consciously or unconsciously intimidated by the Intensive Care team and if you don't know how the Intensive Care team is making decisions in those situations, you and your Family will never have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!
Your job therefore is to stop being intimidated by the perceived power of the Intensive Care team and your job simply is to stop acting submissive towards the Intensive Care team, start acting with confidence and assume that you can have PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence!
Do that and I bet that the Intensive Care team will notice and I bet if you do only that, the dynamics change in your favour...
Related Article:
How to stop being intimidated by the Intensive Care team and how you will be seen as equals
3. Families of
critically ill Patients in Intensive Care are not asking the right questions
If I had a Dollar $$$ for every Family in Intensive Care who is afraid to ask the right and also often uncomfortable questions about their critically ill loved one's situation...
And if I had a Dollar $$$ for every Family in Intensive Care who is afraid to confront the Intensive Care team about their decisions, especially when their critically ill loved one is
- very unstable and in a very critical condition
- in a life threatening situation
- in Intensive Care for long-term treatments and long-term stays
- approaching their end of life in Intensive
Care
I would be a millionaire...
However, your ability to ask the right questions will directly determine your and your Family's level of PEACE OF MIND, control,
power and influence!
Think about the situations that I mentioned before and you will realize that you and your Family can't afford not to ask the right questions...
The good news is that if you are reading this right now, you and your Family have come to the right place because you are right on your way to get the recipe for asking the right questions...
How important do you think it would be to ask the right and succinct questions if your critically ill loved one is in one of the
situations that I mentioned above?
4. Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care are not looking "BEHIND THE SCENES"
This is the deadliest sin out of all sins and I can't stress enough the importance of you knowing and understanding what's happening "behind the scenes" in Intensive Care!
In more than 15 years of Intensive Care nursing in three different countries I have had the insights to
know and understand how the Intensive Care team will "sell" different situations to you and your Family so that they can continue driving their agenda!
For example, some suggestions about "withdrawal of treatment" or about "limitation of treatment" for your critically ill loved one by the Intensive Care team may directly come from the Intensive Care team's interest in admitting other admissions into Intensive
Care and freeing up the bed that your critically ill loved one is currently occupying.
On the other hand, if your loved one is in a real end of life situation, the Intensive Care team may suggest to you and your Family to "continue treatment", even though the Intensive Care team is unnecessarily prolonging your loved one's suffering because the Intensive Care team may want to continue doing RESEARCH or the Intensive Care team wants to continue earning money...
The bottom line is that most decisions in Intensive Care are made "behind the scenes" and if you and your Family don't educate yourself quickly and if you're not looking "behind the scenes" in Intensive Care, the Intensive Care team will continue driving the bus without you even knowing which direction it's going...
Also, check out our "YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED" section
where I answer all of YOUR questions
http://intensivecarehotline.com/category/questions/
In this week I answer
another question from one of our readers and the question this week is
My aunty is FAILING OVER AND OVER AGAIN to be weaned off
the VENTILATOR and she has a Tracheostomy! She's also on Kidney Dialysis, WHAT SHOULD WE DO?
Find the answer to this question here http://intensivecarehotline.com/aunty-failing-weaned-ventilator-tracheostomy-shes-also-kidney-dialysis/
If you want your questions answered just hit reply to this email or email me
at support@intensivecarehotline.com and I'll answer your questions!
Also keep an eye out for our upcoming product launch in the next couple of months! We are NOW finalizing our first product
that will help Families of critically ill Patients deal with and take control of most situations in Intensive Care, even if their loved one is dying!
The product will be an "IN-DEPTH" education product for Families of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care and a SHORTCUT for Families to control, power& influence! The focus of the education product will be on PEACE OF MIND, control, power and influence during
the following situations in Intensive Care
- long-term stays in Intensive Care
- end- of- life situations
- Family meetings
- withdrawal of treatment situations and/or perceived medical
futility
- severe head and brain injuries
The product will be made available in Ebook, Video and Audio format so that our Customers can consume the product in their chosen medium!
If you have any questions about our upcoming products or if you have any suggestions please let me know at support@intensivecarehotline.com
Your Friend
Patrik Hutzel
Critical Care Nurse
Founder& Editor
WWW.INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM
